What's Next? (a random table inspired by RotLD III)

I just watched Return of the Living Dead III, and if you haven't go do that now. Seriously. It's pretty cool.

For those of you that have, here's a table of events in it that could be what's in the next hex, what happens when the PCs go off map, or the like...some of these are out of order. Some are events, some are NPCs, some are just room dressing.

1. An inept guard
2. a couple fucking
3. someone's father makes a drink
4. bad news
5. someone urges their companion to dangerous thrills
6. an accident; one person dies, one person lives
7. someone has a dead loved one, is pretending they're alive to achieve a goal
8. a scientist is experimenting on severed limbs (animate)
9. someone steals a uniform
10. a series of weird, narrow windows internal to a structure
11. someone breaks a seal they know to contain evil, hoping for a good result
12. the dead come back to life, but don't remember dying
13. a container of gas, a protective suit
14. weird, mutated undead attack the people who were "controlling" them
15. a skeleton rips out of it's body
16. a hot redhead
17. a gang of tough guys playing an innocent game
18. someone eats food gluttonously, spits it out
19. a gang of toughs harassing a couple, couple are hiding a secret that could destroy them all
20. an armed merchant fighting off a robbery
21. a gang of toughs fighting undead
22. law enforcement or other authority chasing the wrong people
23. someone getting off on pain
24. intelligent undead creating nonintelligent undead
25. mindless undead attack
26. a specialized military unit equipped to deal with local magical menace
27. pipes, steam
28. a crazy vagrant who tells a scary anecdote relevant to the current situation
29. unexpected help navigating the area
30. someone with a note from a higher authority taking over command of a situation in progress, is protested
31. a military unit goes rogue
32. a father, heavily armed and looking for his son
33. a woman turning into something else
34. an underground lair, rats, stuff glued to walls that is meaningful to the owner
35. someone makes a speech that abstracts your plans into a general theory of happiness
36. a symbolic token is given that must be passed on under specific conditions (EG an act of altruism)
37. a gang of thugs infiltrating a sewer lair
38. someone jumps off a bridge
39. a couple sneaking onto a military base
40. criminals and the military both closing in on the PCs
41. someone transforming into something more dangerous and a lot cooler
42. criminals torturing and questioning
43. a narrow escape
44. tour of a military base with harnessed monsters
45. monsters loose in a palace of authority
46. a scientist with a powerful weapon
47. a fiery conflagaration
48. death makes someone way weirder
49. a weapon that seemed powerful proves ineffective
50. something from the past, thought contained, is unleashed